I started Brian’s Family Law to promote a way of family law practice that is often ignored, dismissed and/or avoided by other attorneys: it involves open communication. To me, open communication is critically important to create a path to resolution in the instant litigation and any future litigation.
In my experience, if there is no open communication, parties will frequently become engaged in what is called a “conflict trap.” Traditionally, a “conflict trap” refers to a society or a country that is stuck in a cycle of recurrent conflict and violence. In a conflict trap, a history of violent conflict has left deep scars and led to mistrust, grievances, and a sense of injustice among different groups within a society. These unresolved issues can fuel further conflicts, perpetuating a cycle of violence and making it difficult for the society to move forward.
While the scale in a family law case is much smaller than at the societal level, the same rationale applies in family law: parties frequently become stuck in a cycle of escalating litigation in which both attempt to gain “leverage” over the other sufficient to make the other party submit to his/her demands. Rarely does that work. In fact, quite frequently it has the opposite effect. So, instead of ending the case, it perpetuates the conflict and results in the continuation of the case. And, the continuation of the conflict results in far greater stress and anxiety for you, as well as a very expensive process. Indeed, frequently the attorneys are the only “winners” in a case that involves a conflict trap. And, that is why many attorneys don’t want you to communicate with the other side: it keeps the conflict going.
My goal is to avoid conflict traps before they begin or resolve them if I come into a case in which the trap has already been set. To me, a successful case achieves your goals, keeps the cost down and, perhaps most importantly, creates an environment for you and the other side to communicate positively. The latter will permit you both to hopefully avoid litigation in the future when issues inevitably arise, particularly in child custody and visitation settings. This is the purpose of Brian’s Family Law.
